The day has come where my heart has literally left my chest cavity and is walking out there in the world. Gruesome yes….but true. My little man…my sweet first born…the one with the thousand freckles and the dimple and the heart of gold….the one that taught me how to truly love another human…he has officially started school and I think I am gonna need all the tissues.
I remember the day that he was only about one week old and I was walking to the kitchen in our old house and I looked down at this newborn little squish in my arms and started SOBBING. Not in a cute tear-rolling-down-my-cheek way….no….more like snot running into my nose and my eyelids puffed up to block my vision VERY UGLY cry. And I said to Jeremy “he is so so big and next thing you know he will be in school and then get married and then leave me forever.”
DO YOU SEE WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE PEOPLE!? It’s begun. The next thing. And I am officially DYING. I need a corner so that I can go sit and rock in it in the fetal position.
Pray for me. I am gonna probably need some medication if they ever decide they want to go to college. Heavy medication. And possibly a padded room.
Nextly….I’m making that a word by the way….Nextly I have about a million photos of the beach I need to go through. I know I promised the basement kitchen update and I am so excited to share that but it’s kinda weird to talk about summer vacation once school has started…so I think I am gonna push the kitchen back a little.
Also…if you follow me on Instagram (I’m @bowerpowerblog by the way and I am pretty talented about talking about random things on there…so you should consider following me. We could be IG friends.)….if you follow me, you’ll know that we had the living room and foyer painted…here’s a sneak peek…
I know! Boring, right?! But seriously beige/tan/latte/greige has never looked so freaking awesome. I have waited over four years for this and it is literally like I can breathe in my house now. Imagine holding your breath for that long! I walked in from vacation and it was all done (Bravo to my painter Carlos and his wife who rocked this!) and now I am slowly putting my house back together! I think I am gonna post about this next so stay tuned, mmkay!?
And for those of you that are wondering…the color name is Benjamin Moore’s Stingray. It’s exactly the color we have in our hallway downstairs and upstairs and was the plan for these spaces and I absolutely. love. it.
I feel your pain. My “baby” (and I only have one!) is starting MIDDLE SCHOOL in 2 weeks!! How the heck does this happen?!? I’ve just been uploading photos to order online for the past hour and was looking at his first day of Kindergarten picture. When I compare it to his last day of Grade 5 picture it literally BREAKS. MY. HEART. :'(
On a completely different topic, that pic of your 4 boys is beyond beautiful–I hope you enlarge it and hang it somewhere special in your (newly painted!!) home…..which I can’t wait to see updates of, btw!
Crazy! But also so exciting for him! x
Our son was born on April 12 and starts kindergarten here in Nova Scotia next Thursday. I’m not sure if you have seen it or not but there was this amazing article written for the Huffington post that sums up beautifully how you are feeling.. Google To My Fellow Moms, on the First Day of Kindergarten and read it.. You will be a hot mess when you are done.. But your heart will be singing !!
Good Luck in the days to come !
Love the color on the walls! And Will looks SO big and he is just so handsome!!! #goodluckmama
This was my first horns first day of Kindergarten too. My goal was to make it back to the car without crying. I succeeded….only to ugly cry alone in the car in the school parking lot. I counted the hours until the school bus (eeeeekkk bus!!!) dropped my baby off. It was a long day but she had fun. It’s good for her. Good for me. I totally feel your pain.
Will looks so grown up!!! Love the pics and of the 4 adorable boys. 🙂
Boy do I understand the crying, I used to bawl every year, never got easier. Seems like just yesterday, now my daughter teaches kindergarten.
Oh Katie — I feel you…..sooo much!!! My oldest started Kindergarten on the 12th. He is going all day. I just know that I am going to blink and he will be off to college too — Dying!!! Its so crazy isn’t it….Where did these almost 6 years for me, go?!?!
I know it’s hard letting them grow up, but it’s really cool when they do grow up to be awesome adults and make you feel like you musta done something right! Mine’s 29 and one of my best friends. She’ll always be my baby but now she’s that and so much more. They can never truly leave you because they’ll always be wrapped around your heart.
Hang in there mama!! No padded rooms yet, you’re doing great!!!
Love the wall color and can’t wait to see the vacay pics!!!
Oh boy I’ll probably be the same way when little Jackson is a week old (Due 12/17). By the way I LOVE the color you chose for your home. I’m so excited for you I know you HATED that hideous toothpaste color.
Oh, Katie, I know how you feel. Luckily when my twin boys started kindergarten I was the school librarian, so got to be kind of with them and it wasn’t so traumatic.
But, when they left for college, I would go sit on the floor of their empty room and weep.
Now they are grown men, husbands, and daddies. And that is something to see…your baby holding his baby.
Regarding your newly painted rooms: Yeah! No more toothpaste color! Looking forward to seeing them in all of their awesome glory.
It stinks, but you will become adjusted to the new schedule of school and him being away.. Just pray that I can adjust as I bring my eldest to college 7 hrs away! #needallthetowels
That’s so exciting. Happy first week of school Will!
I literally just said to my friend that I’m going to have to be heavily medicated when college comes around. Last year was my oldest child’s kindergarten year, and I was a million months pregnant and just a total hormonal wreck. I cried in the principal’s office on her first day.
It gets easier. 1st grade has started, a week and a half in, and I only hold my breath about half the day now. 🙂
You are such a tease! 😉 I’m soo excited to see your living room/foyer/staircase reveal! I’ve been there right along side of you, waiting 4 years, and I’m really eager to see-everything looks so much better against white trim! Xx
I looked at the picture and wonder who is the third older boy… He got lost in the crowd, poor little guy I clearly remember your first boys and now new baby.,..
I was in your shoes many years ago. I thought I might have to seek pharmaceutical help to get myself right again when my son went to kindergarten. But I focused on using that time to give my little girl some special time with mom. There are so many special experiences and memories to come try not to focus on the fact that he is “gone” from you for a time each day. My son made me a grandmother 7 weeks ago and there is nothing like watching your sweet son hold his own sweet baby. Cherish every new step.
Katie,
I had the same kind of moment when my son was a week old. Then I read I’ll love you forever book. BAD IDEA! You’re not alone!
awww this is the sweetest post! I am about to have my first so I can’t REALLY relate yet, but this post was so moving and relatable. GOOD LUCK! I’ll send up some quick prayers! And … that picture of the boys on the beach is really spectacular. Freaking adorable family.
It’s hard. My baby is 21, has a man bun and graduates from college in the spring. It’s a whole new world when they start school but I have to say that I loved the elementary years. It’s such a fun time and my kids were adorable.
Awww, hang in there. That picture of your kiddos is so, so sweet!
Hang in there Katie! My oldest is a Senior in college and I remember dropping him off to live on campus like it was yesterday…talk about an ugly cry!!! Funny thing is that I have two younger daughters (ages 13 & 11) and all of those firsts with them haven’t been as hard. I think it’s a boy thing…sons have a different hold on our hearts. And since you’ve got 4 boys…you’re in for years of ugly cries! 🙂 On a happier note, I love the paint color! We recently painted our family room and kitchen Senora Gray, which is one darker than Stingray. It’s a great color family.
No more toothpaste color!!!!!!!!!!! I bet you are thrilled :):) It looks awesome! Can’t wait to see more 🙂
I have to admit that I haven’t been too sad when it’s the first day of school. The last child is a high school senior this year and I’ve had kids in every stage of school: preschool, elementary, high school and college for 38 years!
I love the paint color and got a swatch and a sample. But I was surprised at the green undertone when looking at the sample and your pictures. I will try it because I’m hoping it will tone down the red in my dark Brazilian cherry hardwood.