Emotional doesn’t start to describe how I feel about this place….
I know. I’ve said it a million times…but I can’t help it. I miss that house. I get overly emotional thinking about it really. I have just had such a hard time saying goodbye and then cutting the proverbial cord. Weirdly hard. And I don’t expect anyone to understand. Excuse me while I get my box of Kleenex.
Seriously though…that box built of sticks and steel is like a person for me. And I’ve been grieving these last six months at the loss. Technically speaking I think we still own the home…but that doesn’t mean that it is ours. Afterall, we don’t live there anymore. And I know that I should be happy to be in such a lovely place now. I do. I am thankful and feel blessed…but it hasn’t been home. Not like this place was.
Pretty much everytime I have a phone date with Sherry, I tell her how it hasn’t changed. At first, I thought moving our bed into the room and sleeping here would do the trick. Then Sher suggested painting to give me more a feeling of ownership…so I painted the first floor bathroom. But it didn’t make that room mine…now it’s just someone else’s prettier loo. Then I tried again with the dining room…same result…still not my home. just a house.
That’s probably why I kinda dreaded it when I found out that a recent ebay purchase was accidentally sent to our old address. Although I had met the new family, I was worried that they didn’t appreciate our first home. that they would let it go to pot. That it was nothing special to them. Is it weird that I am tearing up typing this?
I just simply remember the good. The lovely. The day that these mirrors fell off the wall while Jeremy & I slept – scaring us enough to hunch behind our door with a baseball bat for a solid forty five minutes.
I remember the light in the dressing room being one of the first things I ever blogged about. And painting the walls that shade of pink thinking that one day we would have a little girl…
And how I first ventured into the world of upholstery with those green chairs and literally almost died.
I remember finishing up this guest room just in the nick of time to be on the Nate Berkus Show.
And how Will took his first steps from the tan chair in the den to land in my waiting arms 🙂
I remember ripping out the old cabinets, staining the new ones, laying the floor, and installing that backsplash one tile at a time….and the nights of Taco Bell with Jeremy on that floor even before we were married.
I remember it all. And they are like sugar on my mind. So this past week, I called D (let’s just call her that to be easy) to pick up all the old packages. And it went a little something like this…
I walked over the threshold…the same one Jeremy carried me over on our wedding night…to see a rack we installed full of bookbags with a cute bench underneath…and I knew. I just knew. It was good. This was just as sweet. Different and sweet.
The living room looks different – but comfortable for the family of six that lives there.
I loved how D wasn’t scared to make this room her own with those mix-n-match window dressings. She watches a friend’s baby some days and that big faux bois rug is perfect for playtime. Plus, it’s so chic that I almost stole it…I even considered it for a second but figured that it probably wouldn’t fit in my bag. And if she saw me, I would have to say oh this? this wasn’t one of the packages that you were holding for me? and then I’d pause awkwardly as I unrolled it mumbling explitives under my breath.
And beyond the living room was the den – outfitted just lovely. I was so proud that D created space that had similar bones to what I remembered doing there but with her own twist.
One of the most exciting things to see was a desk in the den. I know…some folks probably don’t think this is very thrilling but to me it was. Here’s why – it means that they care. They care about what their kids are looking at online. They care about spending time together in the same room. It speaks volumes about what is more important than making a room perfect looking – that a home is about family.
The kitchen still looked stunning. I was excited to see that D had even purchased the same chairs from Ikea for the bar 🙂
Almost as excited as I was to see cookies…yup. D is amazing. ‘Nough said.
Now for one of my favorite rooms…the dining room. I heart that table. I never would have dreamed a table that large would fit in that room…but D made it work.
And believe it or not, she got a curio cabinet for free (sound familiar?) and painted it to go in the corner. She even followed my steps…talk about being flattered!
But my favorite rooms in the house were these two.
The first was the boys room. Because I can see boys being themselves in here. They are sports fans…they are imperfect…they are fun and themselves and full of life.
And my other favorite room was the former dressing room which is now D’s daughters bedroom. This was what it was always meant to be. This was what this room was supposed to hold.
And as I squeezed the trigger on my camera to capture this little girls happy little room, I realized something I had forgotten. Our time in any place is temporary. Our time here on earth is short and sometimes sweet. And our homes are the places we share with the ones we love. I forgot that ever famous saying….This Too Shall Pass.
And while we were wandering the house, contemplating grand-theft-rug and eating chocolate cookies and completely forgetting why we were there in the first place, I saw Will. And you know what? He didn’t know it. He didn’t know the house. He didn’t know the rooms or where to go or, well, anything.
Later that night I realized that our new house…the one with the dirty wood floors and the weird gold fixtures and the bare walls, that house was Will’s home. It’s the only home he knows.
And I want to be home where he is. I want to my home to be with the ones I love. And so I made up my mind. And now I am on Mission Home Making…I will make this bruised whale my own…just like I did with the old house. I will hang things on the walls. I will create spaces for my family. I will make this home.
I owe all this closure to D. I am so thankful for her. The fact she was excited to make my baby, her baby…even if it is just a house. That she made me feel welcome. That she appreciated and deserved this kind of home. And that she was a good mom, with good kids, who did it with them as her most important priority on a tight budget in less than 6 months. That was simply an answer to prayer. I am glad she is there…I am glad that this home is now theirs. And I am glad to say goodbye.
p.s. Whew – so much emotionally stuff makes me a little coo-coo…so go watch this video to get a detox.
good for you katie bower! make that house your home, fill it with memories and things you love and have a great time doing it, God bless!
i am all teary-eyed reading this beautiful post. i’ve been looking into different houses in our area for a few months now. one more bedroom, a bigger yard, a kid-friendlier neighborhood. every time i point one out to my husband on our drives about town, my 4 year old gets upset. “no, mommy,” she’ll say all sniffly, “i don’t wanna move. i want my own house.” this post made me “get it”. this is the only house she’s ever known. this is her house. it may not be exactly what i want at this stage in our life, but it’s hers and her brother’s (who is a few weeks older than will). and that is what is most important.
happy (finally!) home making!
I do not enjoy crying at 8am! 🙂 For a second there I thought I was missing my first home .. I’m glad you were able to go back and see it with a new family.
I was trying to look up that saying about a house being a home but then I got a lot of results from the show glee… so just imagine I said something really insightful, K?
Yeah ok, you totally made me tear up. It’s so nice to see your old home being loved, and cared for… I can honestly say that’s one thing that tears at my hearstrings, when I drive by my childhood home because it is not cared for… it does not know the love that my parents put into it…
Beautiful post!
Thanks for sharing your struggle with letting go and your new perspective this morning…thank you. It makes me feel like I am not alone in how I am feeling about our house.
:: exactly how i felt about moving. 12 months in + it’s just now starting to feel like home. p.s. i’m new to your blog + i like it 🙂
That’s so sweet! It was wonderful for D to give you a tour of the house. It looks like she has taken great pride in it and turned it into a home.
I know exactly how you feel. My fiance and I just moved to our second apartment and sometimes I miss the old one. The layout was terrible and the lady next to us smoked like a chimney but it’s also where he proposed to me and where we first starting combining all of our things. We love our new place but I’m still waiting for it to smell like us. Once it does, then I’ll know it’s our home.
Made me tear up! We’ve not moved from our first ‘newlywed’ house, but I can imagine that when we do, I’ll have many of these same feelings. It’s weird, but a home does become part of a family!
Oh, Katie…this post tugs at the ole’ heart strings. My husband and I bought our first house 2 years ago. A little bungalow with a little screened in porch and a little swing from the tree in the back yard. And though it was small and on a busy street, we (like you) had many firsts tearing apart the kitchen, painting walls, and making it ‘home.’ After less than a year in our little home, my husband got a job in a small town about 45 miles away. So we moved into a large fixer-upper with beautiful built-ins and tons of space. Even though we’ve put SO much work into this new house, it just doesn’t quite feel like home yet. I still walk in the door and smell someone else’s house. I still go up someone else’s creaky stairs. Hopefully I’ll be making our house ‘home’ right along with you. 🙂
Oh wow! Thank you for posting this! I too moved away from my first house last year with my young son. I too have been grieving over leaving that house. Although the new house is bigger and nicer it has yet to feel like home. Just recently have I finally been able to start hanging pictures on the walls and personalizing this house a bit more. I’m finally ok with letting go. I didnt get to go inside the old house (so nice it was a great experience for you!) but I would drive by occasionally. Now that it looks like the new owners are taking care of the house well, it has eased the difficulty of letting go. Thank you for the extra reminders that everything is temporary and this too shall pass. My husband had a hard time understanding my emotional attachment to the old house…have to show him what you wrote. I’m not the only one! Thank you so much for sharing 🙂
Such a sweet post. Isn’t it funny how peace finds us just when we least expect it? Glad you’re feeling better.
Isn’t it funny that it takes a trip back to where we came from to move forward? If had similar instances in my life. If I ever had to leave my current (first) house, I know I would really struggle. Its my heart.
While I think it’s too early in the morning to shed tears, this was beautifully stated & I didn’t mind reaching for the tissues.
Even though I own my own home now & work tirelessly to make it cozy, I was recently devastated to hear my Father was leaving the house I grew up in to move to the beach. I have been feeling sorry for myself & crying over the thought of ‘a very sandy Christmas’ for weeks now, but I really think you put things in perspective.
A young family has moved in, and thinking of their beautiful daughter enjoying the things I enjoyed about the home fill my heart with happiness. That house needs to have a family, not just a 60 year old bachelor who waits for his daughter to come home one weekend a month.
Thank you Katie for giving me a dose of reality this morning!
i totally feel ya. i recently had this same change… moving from a “starter” home with my husband that we poured our blood sweat and tears into a big, blank canvas. feeling so lost. so sad- desperatly wanting it back. and then i drove by and saw the family riding bikes and having fun in “my” driveway. it was the closure i needed. i drove straight to goodwill to find something fun to start a project with… and boy did i- i’m on my way to making my house a “home”!!!
I’m glad you were able to find closure!
PS- That rug is amazing.
love, love, love these thoughts KB! :o) thanks for sharing.
I loved reading, because I had nearly the same thing happen when we moved 3 years ago. And because the house we moved to was so much bigger and nicer, I felt like a complete whiner for feeling so sad. To make it worse, the new people haven’t taken care of the outside quite as well as we did. But I’m finally getting better and I don’t get teary when I drive by anymore. You are so lucky that D has done such a great job. It’s nice to know that other people grieve their homes, too. 🙂
This post made me cry!!
Our first is due in November, and we plan to leave this house in a few years. I’ve already gotten teary eyed many times thinking about leaving this home, but I know that I can make home anywhere as long as my beloved husband and precious daughter are with me!
Wow, Katie B. I’m not an every-day-reader of your blog but, perhaps I should be. This was such a sweet post. I love the rack full of backpacks and how everything came full circle with the little girls bedroom. The imagery of you two sitting on the floor eating a fourth meal…or how Will took his first steps in the den. Seriously, a beautiful story and I wish you all the best in your current home. It will be just as magical with time. You just need to build up those memories again 🙂
This post totally made me cry. I’m so happy you got done closure and also a new sense of purpose. And can I say that I’m totally in love with D’s red mirror over the mantel?
SOME closure. Ugh, stupid autocorrect.
Can’t wait to see what you do with the new place!
Now why am I crying? Love your sweet post. It is so nice to see the new family embracing your old home. It must feel so good to see they love it there too!
sweet post. thanks for the remember that we will all spend eternity somewhere else.
this place is temporary, and so are our homes, but our souls are forever.
Dear Katie~How true your words are…Thank you for being so vulnerable and transparent with all of us. By your willingness to share your heart with so many, lives will be forever transformed. I, too have had the same struggle with my “new” home. I was a single mom to a beautiful little boy for many years. God had blessed us with a rental on the lagoon, in an incredible, happy, active neighborhood, surrounded by laughing children and the sweetest people. We were safe. We were loved. We were finally free of so much pain and heartache. Our landlords had become family to us. Our boys were best friends. There were late-night man-hunts~flashlights blazing and joyful giggles, pool parties, crabbing, boating. Everything was so great in our world. We couldn’t imagine leaving there…Ever. Well, in 2008, I remarried. We found out we were expecting a baby in Nov. of 2009. We purchased a home, only minutes away,but far enough away that my son couldn’t walk to our old stomping ground. Our new neighborhood is full of little people, but almost no one my son’s age. While I should have been celebrating the blessings, and my own chance to transform my new home, I found myself completely stuck in mourning. I had gained so much, and yet found myself focusing on the home I had given up. I had to make the conscious effort(after lots and lots of prayer) to just “start” somewhere. For me, that meant hanging pictures, PERSONALIZING our space, allowing every wall and room and piece of furniture to truly reflect who we are. My home wasn’t going to LOVE me until I showed it how to… Your home is beautiful. You have amazing gifts, and it’s so exciting to see your place transform. My old place(like yours) is being rented by someone else now. It has been completely remodeled, and yet “feels” like the happy, free place it was before. Now, I can celebrate the fact that I have a new friend in the tenant, and be so happy that he has a chance to experience the bliss of that place. Meanwhile, my home is transforming daily into a place of love and life of its own. Thank you Katie for everything you do to make this world a brighter, happier, more inspired place. Luv ya girl!!!
That’s super cool that she allowed you to take pictures of the home!!! I wonder what she had done to Will’s old room?!?!?! My husaband and I are in the preliminary stages of buying our first home and I fear that I won’t be able to make it feel like home 🙁 !! Good luck……….I know that day will come…..matter of time and lots of new memories made (maybe another Nate Berkus appearence will do the trick?!?! 🙂 )!!
what a sweet sweet post. i can totally see myself getting attached to my first house (when i finally have one). and not that it is the same but i will be getting a new car in the next year or so and i feel sad about giving up my very first car.
so glad you have someone who is taking care of your first house baby for you 🙂
beautifully said.
We moved into our first home a year ago. Like you I thought by now I would have made progress into making it our home. My husband and I love our house and though we are comfortable there and we know it’s our home something is still missing. I thought in a year we would have done more to make it us. The previous owners still seem to dominate in our house. The wall colors are still their colors, the light fixtures are still theirs, even some of the curtains. Sometimes I feel like my stuff is in someone else’s house. I have to realize that these things take time and money. I guess you need to get a feel for the house before you can really start to make the changes that are right for you and your family. I see many wonderful things for our house and sometimes I wish I could snap my fingers and have it all done. But how fun would that be?! 🙂 We do not have any kids but we love having people over and and we are building memories every day. Memories that will last a lifetime and beyond. Just this weekend my husband put a half bottle of Dawn in the dishwasher and bubbles were coming out everywhere! We laughed our heads off and that makes me feel like I’m home 🙂
I have never posted here but after reading that I had too. Wow. I’m sniffing and teary. I love the reminder that things of this world are temporary even when we sometimes get caught up in the stuff and places instead of the people that make those things matter to us. I really can’t add anything but thanks for the heartfelt post and yeah– I might be crying a while.
Thank you so much for your honesty. I am tearing up here at work reading those words – especially the part about Will. The realization that children know home as where their parents are, their toys are, etc really puts into perspective where our hearts are. I look forward to what you do with the house from here on out!
Your house tour reminded me of the show Trading Up, if that is the one where homeowners tour their old house – I think seeing something changed, and not the same as you knew it, helps you move on. So nice of D to let you post the tour!
Moving Up is the show, oops!
This was a beautiful, heart-achey kind of post. I felt for you every step of the way; in a lot of ways, it’s how I felt about the dorm room at college that I spent two years in, the way I feel about the girl I lived with last year versus the girl I currently live with, and about the places I’ve been versus the places that I’m going.
But, that said, I’m glad that you finally have something like closure, that D’s work with the house and making it her home without taking away from it in any material way, have given you closure. That’s such a sweet, sweet gift.
WONDERFUL POST KATIE – you had me in tears right along with you. I am so happy that you realize home is where your family is and as long as you are with them you will be fine! 🙂 Thank you for sharing…
Crying at work, always a good move. Beautiful post.
Love this post, Katie!
Your first house was (and still is) beautiful. What you made of it is something to be proud of! And now go girl – create something great in your new HOME!!
Hi Katie! I don’t post a lot but this post really touched me. (I felt teary the whole time I was reading). It looks like your home has a special family in it and I have complete faith that your new home will feel more like your own with time. This was a beautiful post and I am so glad you were able to see your house and get a sense of peace about it all.
Oh, Katie! I am soooo glad to hear this. I was reading and reading and hoping for a happy ending. D has put her own family’s stamp on the house and it looks great. I’m glad Will was with you to help you make the transition. I am sighing in relief for your lil heart.
Now go forth and love that whale! (Your whale, $herdog’s walrus… what’s up today? haha)
xoxo
beautiful. glad you’ve had some healing.
some change of perspective.
it’ll be fun to see the changes you make.
Ok, after reading all the other comments, I’m glad to know I’m not the only sap over here crying!! LOL. You definitely struck a cord with me with this post. I’m not a huge fan (at all) of the house we currently live in. I have put off painting and doing other things that I want to it in hopes that we will get out of here soon. But, you are so right…..this is home. It’s where my daughter is growing up, it’s where my husband comes every night after work, it’s where we’ve shared birthdays and Christmases. So thank you. I’m on a mission now too!
Beautiful post, Katie. And I am so excited to see more “home-making” on your blog. I think your new home is beautiful. I love your style and I’m excited to see your new place transform from house to home. (:
All I can say is ‘YES!!!!’ You have ur mojo back 🙂 !!!!
Xxx
Well it seems as though you had all of us crying this morning. I flashed back to about a year ago when we had been in our “new” house for about a month and a half. My then three year old came up to me with tears in his eyes and said, “Mommy, I want to go home.” I said, “Sweetie, this is our home.” To which he proceeded to crush me with, “No, our other home.” Talk about devastating. Realizing that we gave up the only home he’d ever known, the one with the things hanging on the walls, the clean bathrooms, the one that didn’t smell bad, the one that didn’t have his mom and dad working day and night on (instead they were spending time with him and his big brother). It hurt…bad. Back to now and we can’t imagine being back there (though in all honesty it still hurts to drive by). We’ve more than doubled our space inside and quadrupled or quintupled our space outside. There are tradeoffs for sure. Busier street, more to clean, more to mow…but it’s good. It’ll be even better a year from now. And it’ll be the same for you guys. I always hear “It was a God thing.” I think that’s what happened for you Katie. God sent you to your former home (via ebay of all things) so that you could know that D had fixed it up so nicely for her family, that she had respected all of the hard work that you and Jeremy had put into it, she loves it so much that she welcomed you back to see it, proud of what she had accomplished on both the time and money budget. God also motivated you to start making your new house a home for the Bowers, so the Reises would have some inspiration! I’m starting to fade over here!! 🙂 Hugs to you…
I love this post Katie! I’m so glad to hear you have made some peace with your move. I must say, I absolutely cannot wait to see what project you take on in making your new house your home.
This was such a sweet post. I remember feeling the same way when we sold our first house. My little man was 5 months old at the time. I still drive by it every now and then, just wishing I could go in and and take a peek.
I can’t wait to see all that you do in your new house to make it yours.
Oh, and D is awesome! How sweet that she let you take all of those pictures. I kinda want that red mirror over her fireplace.
Beautiful post, Katie! Love your description of a house vs. a home.
What a sweet post. I grew up moving a lot as a child, and I can say that certain houses felt more like “home” than others. I’ll never forget being dropped off from ballet one day (to one of the more homey houses) not knowing that the movers had come to take everything that day — and just sitting down on the bottom step and crying. I’m pretty sure my parents dragged me crying from that house. I think I was about 8, and I still have dreams about that house. So some places just stick with you more than others, I guess, but you are completely right: home is where the people you love are, and this too shall pass.
Something else that makes a place feel like home to me: fabric. Weird, I know, but I’m talking about soft things and things with memories like old quilts, new blankets, clean sheets, interesting rugs (that don’t scratch too much), fluffy towels, and lots of down pillows. Like I said, weird.
Oh, and something else you might consider, maybe just for Will even, would be to write the story of your old house (including all of your favorite memories like the ones you included in this post), add your beautiful photographs, and create a book. You can do this on Snapfish and other sites like that fairly easily and cheaply. Maybe putting the memories in the book would allow you to keep them close to you, but also allow you to move on. Plus, although your current house is Will’s home, you could read the story to Will so he’d know all about his old, first home. Just a thought.
Katie, did you blog at all about how you installed your kitchen cabinets? I searched, but couldnt find anything detailed. I have always thought that was an “impossible” task needing a professional. I am interested :). I really want to demo my bathroom… and put in two separate since cabinets and mirrors (instead of one connected), but I am too nervous. Also, have ya’ll done any wiring??? I have all these places I want to put lights, but there is no wiring there. I have thought about calling a professional, but wondered if you did something like that?
Best wishes with your mission, Katie! I also was inspired by how creatively and beautifully (and QUICKLY!) D made the house “home.” It really spoke powerfully to me, and I was challenged to make sure I’m doing all I can to make our house (I got married 5 months ago and moved into my husband’s house) “our home.” Thanks!
What a beautiful post! I completely understand your feelings of longing for the old house, but I think you’ve got such a great perspective now. I know that I am constantly feeling the pang of wanting a house right now, especially when I try to cram one more thing into our cramped little rental apartment — and I have to tell myself the same thing about all places and things being temporary.
Bless your heart! Congrats on making this break-through!
Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! This was an awesome post! I have been in my new house for about 3 months and I have only had the feeling of “this is my home” once and it only stayed for about two min. Our old house was out first everything as well including our first child. This post was my emotions to a tee! If you were standing my me right now I think that I would just hug you and cry like a baby. I really needed that!
Thank you so much for that post. I can really relate. We just built a house and moved in last May, had our third little girl in October and we are just now getting around to making our house our home.
So well written! Heartwarming, touching and a so true. Thank you for sharing such a great story. I didn’t know of your blog back when you had your old house so it was nice to ‘visit’. I can’t wait to watch you make your new house your own. It is lucky to have you and your adorable family. 🙂 Thanks for the great blog Katie – I love it!
I could have wrote this post a few years ago..We had moved and it was so overwelming trying to pick all the projects that needed to be completed..It finally begin to feel like home when we started making memories..My daughters first steps, holidays, bringing home our third baby. Of course me getting into the blog world and being able to get tons of inspiration for decor was a positive too..I think with time your home will become yours..
I was just talking to another mama about this the other day.
My munchkin was born IN our last house. We spend long nights in the living room and cuddled as a new family in our old window seat. On my maternity leave we walked to a specific park…and my old house was pre-walking – so it could be white, and pretty, and pure.
The new house is babyproofed and So different.
Time to move on for me too – and maybe to make a pretty white mama room somewhere here…maybe the bathroom?
what a lovely post. its time to make your new home, home. having just moved into a new space, I now what you mean. Sometimes I look at the walls and the furniture and think I’m visiting. Last night I hung some wall art and drapes, all the sudden it started to feel right. Look forward to seeing you new projects!
Woman! Quit playin’ games with my heart. Now you go paint your walls and hug your front door. And thanks for the inspiration. Love it!
Woo! Trying really hard to fight little sobs at my computer desk by drinking more gulps of coffee. This might be the most touching post of yours that I have ever read- and I really thought all the posts about Will were really touching. I think that was it, when you looked over and realized that this wasn’t home for Will- geesh, trying not to cry again- that is so.. that’s the point. Thats the underlined, fat yellow marker part. I think this could be the one post that would sum up the Bower Power blog for me, if I had to pick one. It had all the elements of you in it- your love of family, kindness, attachment, motherly love… even your concerns about the internet. SO good. SO good.
Thanks for posting this Katie! Since we moved into our seen-better-days foreclosure home in April, I’ve been feeling the exact same way. My friends laugh that my post on the day we moved was a sweet tribute”Good Bye Bungalow”- http://oneprojectatatime.blogspot.com/2011/04/good-bye-bungalow.html, followed the next day by “Oh My God We Bought a Dump!” http://oneprojectatatime.blogspot.com/2011/04/oh-my-god-we-bought-dump.html. I had no love for our new guy. None.
My brand of crazy sent me the complete other direction though- tirelessly throwing myself at home improvement projects trying desperately to make this new house our home quickly. It all takes so much time though, and it still doesn’t feel like home yet. I’m just glad to know I’m not the only one irrationally attached to the old house. Thanks for sharing this today (and everyday!)
Aww, such a sweet post. I still ride by our old townhome sometimes, just to see if it’s being taken care of. You’ve got to give it time to make the new memories in your new house and I’m sure all the work you still have to do makes it feel unfinished and not “there” yet. I’m sure it helped so much that Will didn’t remember the house at all.
Katie, this was a beautiful post. I am glad you are able to move forward and start making your new home into one that your heart feels safe in. Sometimes it’s hard to move forward, especially after a lot of love and memories poured into an old thing, but have fun putting personal touches on your new home!
I’m crying and now I don’t ever want to sell our “starter” home! Even with it’s imperfections!
I understand 100%!!!! We’ve been in our house for nearly 2 years and I still feel as ‘at home’ here as I do at a hotel on vacation. (I actually get homesick for vacation spots instead of home.) It’s a private place where I can relax, but it’s not HOME. I miss my old home (and city) constantly. Like you, we moved into a nicer house, and from the outside looking in, it can be hard for people to understand why I’d miss the old house. Even my husband has a hard time understanding because he’s moved around so much, he’s never had a deep sense of home. I say that I have a healthy amount of dislike for this house in that it’s enough to motivate me to make it better, but not enough to drive me completely crazy. It took me about a year to get to the point where you are now where you’re determined to make it work. Unlike you, this is not a ‘forever’ house (or even a 10 year house) so I daydream about the day it’s sold and I walk away for the last time. In the meantime, I work to make it an easy sell so that day will be sooner! 🙂 I’m so happy you have some closure on the old house! Anyway, I really want you to know that you’re not alone, or weird, and that you have support and understanding.
i feel for you, i have much the same feelings about our first home. we lost that home when I got suddenly laid off from my job back in 2008. i don’t have a lot of closure in that area. so i am glad that you have found yours, and like you i am slowly learning and appreciating that my “home” is where ever my family is.
Katie, I completely understand how you feel. Being a military spouse, I have shed my fair share of tears while saying goodbye to a house, and I haven’t even been in one single house as long as you were in your house. The white house was SO gorgeous, I absolutely loved it, but isn’t it so nice to know it is home to a pretty great family who loves it just as much as you?
It may take you a while longer than you think it should, but your new house is going to be YOUR house soon enough. You’ll bring your second child home from the hospital there. You’ll take First Day Of School photos on the front porch, you’ll celebrate your sisters wedding there, you’ll decorate and make it yours in your own time. And then one day you’ll wake up and realize, you don’t know when it happened, and you don’t know how, but all of a sudden, you are in your house.
Thank you for this post, I really enjoyed seeing the white house a la Where Are They Now.
xo
Wow, I totally understand that. Who would have thought a decorating post would be so emotional! We still live in our first home and a month ago we had thought about selling to be closer to work. Turns out that it wouldn’t work out to sell right now and I was relieved! I would tear up every time I thought about selling when talking with my hubbs. Cute post- lovely story 🙂
Thank you! Thank you for writing this post and giving me hope. I love my house so much and am afraid of what leaving it someday will do to me. I have learned so many new skills and established my style. This was my independence house, the house where I took on all the challenges that make me feel like an adult. I know it sounds weird, but houses are so much more than buildings. I do not have a family yet, but my house has helped to shape me and I have so many memories.
I am teary eyed reading this post. This feels like closure for me too…as I’ve been reading your blog for a long time now… D did an AMAZING job with the house and decorating it. It looks amazing….As you, I would feel happy and relieved that someone is taking SUCH good care of your old home.
….Can’t wait for your updates on your new home. I’m glad you feel better, after realizing that Will only knows that his current home is home.
Melissa.
Beautiful post Katie! I think we all feel some emotional attachment to something when we’ve put sooo much hard work into it and made so many memories there.
I just have to ask this. Do you know where D got the curtains for their Den? We recently moved into our new home (new build) and I’m looking for window treatments..those are stunning!!
Oh, man, Katie B. that is some wonderful, heartfelt writing. I’m already teary-eyed from taking my baby to kindergarten today, and this did it, as well! I’m so happy that D let you tour all the rooms and take pictures to share with us so we can join you on your journey. I am thrilled you can begin to fully transition into your new home and I am most looking forward to what you do with Will’s room!
What a great post! You are very lucky to have someone caring for your former house in the way that D does! She did a beautiful job decorating too! I’m curious, did they change anything in Will’s former room yet? I love the wood on the wall and was wondering what they did with it!
Katie –
I know exactly how you feel! And I too, got teary eyed at the end of your post. We moved and later sold our first home when our son Greyson was only 2 months old (He is 9 months old now). We are now in a townhouse and still searching for our next “home”. I feel this overwhelming need to find a house that I can create a home for our little family.
This town home is not cutting it…
You have a stunning home, with potential oozing out of its windows and doors! I cannot wait to see all that you do to make this house a home for you and your family.
oh my, that’s funny!
Oh Goodness Gracious Girl! You have me sitting at my desk crying! And my friend walks by like, “OMG what’s wrong?” Oh, I am sad for Katie missing her house! And now I miss mine! LOL. Ya, they think I am crazy here at work. But I totally relate! I brought my baby girl home to our 1st little house, and we moved just in time for her 1st birthday. I was NOT ok with the new house at first. Though I loved it, it was more than double the size of our little 960 square foot started home, but I loved that little house! And the big dream house was a dream, but not our home! For the 1st month I couldn’t sleep at night. The new one was a 2 story and I have never lived in one before, so every night I woke my husband thinking someone was down stairs steeling out boxes and mess or coming up the stairs to steel my baby! And I was fine being alone in the little house, I was ready to fight to the death if someone came into that house, which was in a worse neighborhood and should have given me much more worry than the new one. Anyway, I was just happy to see someone else felt a loss for their 1st house, their “We are married now,” “I’m pregnant,” “OMG, we have a baby in that bedroom now,” “I love my little house but we need more space for the other kids I want to have house.” It will pass, I think for me it was how Maddi (the munchin) reacted to the new house. And over time I also realized thought we had 5 years of memories in the old one, she had none, and she loves the new house, and I love her more than anything, so, we are all happy now in the dream house!
I found your blog through YHL and I seriously am in love with it. I love your style and your sense of humor literally has me LOLing at work…this is semi-awkward. My coworkers look at me funny and I can’t tell them I’m laughing at a poop/boob joke. Thanks for brightening up my day! (and when I say “day,” I mean DAY. It’s 2 p.m. and I have been stalking your blog all morning/afternoon at work.)
Ok, so this post made me tear up…I can relate to you and I fully understand how you’re feeling. I miss our old house everyday, but I think it’s because we had so many wonderful memories there. We started our marriage there, we started our family there, we had so many wonderful memories there with family and our friends that we miss, dearly. I will always cherish our old house (and city), but it’s time to make this house our home. Thank you for this post, Katie. I enjoy reading your blog.
The best post of yours that I have read thus far. Excellent stuff.
This was a first for me… crying at a Katie Bower blog post! But wow, I just loved this post… so true, it’s all temporary and what matters is the people around us. Hugs!
I’m new to your blog, so I didn’t know anything about your first house…but wow, you had me tearing up! That was a beautiful post.
Hi Katie – I am a long time reader but first time commentor (sp?). Thank you so much for such a beautiful, candid, honest and well-written post. My husband and I moved into a fixer -upper, starting some renovations and then I became pregnant and all work on the house screeched to a halt. Our twin girls are now 15 months old and I finally have time to pick up where we left off but I just haven’t felt the inspiration to do so…until now. Thank you for reminding me that decorating our home is not something I should feel guilty about (as a mom I struggle with putting money and energy into things for myself now). I need to make our house a home for our daughters – the same way that my mom always did and with hopes that they will someday do as well.
Thank you!
Heather
You have me crying over here. This post makes me never want to leave our “starter” home…even with it’s imperfections! But I suppose this should give me hope for if/when we do decide to leave it!
I feel the same way about my current house. It doesn’t feel like home. My “home” is where my ex still lives, but there’s no closure there because he still has the same drapes up (which I made), the same paint on the walls (which I slaved over for days and weeks), and the same furniture I left behind. *sad face*
I’ve been in my current house since May, but most of my things are still packed up in boxes in the basement… I just haven’t felt the motivation to finish up the projects that need to get done in order for me to feel like I can start unpacking. I wish I could figure out how to get my personal closure. Thank you for your take on how you’re getting there, it really helps.
Did you ever read the Anne of Green Gables series? Specifically, “Anne’s House of Dreams”? This post totally reminds me of how Anne felt about moving out of their first little home (the House of Dreams) into Ingleside, the bigger, more family-friendly “forever” home. I think the author must have had the same experience as you, to be able to write so authentically about it. Great books, by the way, if you need some fun wholesome fiction 🙂
Did you ever read the Anne of Green Gables series? Specifically, “Anne’s House of Dreams”? This post totally reminds me of how Anne felt about moving out of their first little home (the House of Dreams) into Ingleside, the bigger, more family-friendly “forever” home. I think the author must have had the same experience as you, to be able to write so authentically about it. Great books, by the way, if you need some fun wholesome fiction. 🙂
Oopsie, sorry about the double-post!
What did D do with the wood wall in wills old room? Did they take it down or leave it up?
Yay for more decorating post to come!
I loved seeing pics of how they changed your house to their home. I can’t wait to see the changes in your current house as you make it your home! What are you going to do? Where are you starting? I’d want to do Will’s room just because kids room are sooo much fun! And then of course, your room or a room to go to and relax when it’s been a long day. Great post!!
They left it up so far. Technically they aren’t allowed to repaint or take anything off the walls without consent until the house sells.
xo – kb
Great pics of your old baby, Katie! It looks like they are taking wonderful care of it which is great [you should check out my tenant story and you will be super duper thankful: http://diariesofdoers.blogspot.com/2011/07/eviction-process.html. I can’t wait to see more updates of your ‘new’ baby 🙂
Katie, great post. I feel the exact same way about my old house. Unlike you, the new owners of my old house are not awesome. They are smokers, own big greasy pets and are unfriendly (according to my old neighbors). It makes my heart *so sad* that the walls I called home now belong to someone who just doesn’t care about it like I did.
Yikes Hilary! That is one crazy story. Yet it’s funny that we both have the same happy ending, huh?
xo – kb
Hi Katie- Longtime reader, but don’t post all that often:) I am echoing sentiments of others here, but it will feel more like home. it really will. promise:) I bought my very own little house that was old and creaky and close to work about 5 years ago- and I loved every moment of it. And then I got married and move to my husbands house (which had subfloor, no baseboards, and is an hour away from work) just over a year ago. It took 9 months of trying to like the house and decorating to try and make up for the fact that it wasn’t my house, before it was to a place where I can say “this feels like home.” Granted, a lot of that had to do with finishing the floors and putting in baseboards:) I still really miss my little home, and the drive to work everyday kills me sometimes, but I can say-13 months later- that this is finally feeling like home. And better yet, I can now say I don’t resent moving. you are only 6 months in, give yourself some more time- keep trying to like it and one day you might walk in the door and it could feel like home!
PS- I love the comment that you got you decorating mojo back:)
You made me cry! I have my house on the market now, lots of reasons, and I am finding it hard to let go. I am excited about a new home but the new home is not my forever home and I just can’t get too excited. I will have to remember, home is where your family is. Thanks for this!
Thank you for this post. We are on an almost eerily similar timeline to both you and Sherry. Left our old dreamhouse, into a newer bigger (but dilapidated) one, with a two year old who will never ever remember the first house that meant so much to us. Last week our daughter looked around the new house and said “Mama, pictures of me?” and I realize I really need to make this house our home…and fast!!!
I cried reading the post. In some ways I am in a similar situation. We bought the house more than a year. This is the first property in our possession. Four months later we brought our daughter to that house. The house is not our dream home, but the best buy that we could afford. The house has lots of potential and we have a vision of how to arrange to be our home, but in a year so little is done. Reading the comments I see that some others have done even less. You’re right, our daughter only recognizes this house as her home and that is why it is worth effort to make a home.
Thanks for your honest words Katie! I’m still in my first home but my parents just moved out of our childhood home to a swanky new condo. It was so weird saying goodbye to that house! My sister’s living overseas so she didn’t get to say goodbye at all. I think Christmas will be especially nostalgic so I’m going to decorate our new home to the nines to make up for it!
I have been waiting for a post like this! I have been following your blog for a long time. I saw the care and love you put into your former home. But, it has always made me a little sad that you never really seemed to settle into your new home as a, well, home. Your true home is always in your heart, where those you love will always reside. However, it is important to reflect that in the place you live. With your amazing decorating style, I have no doubt that your house will be your home before you know it! Besides, your cute little guy will make so many memories in this house, and that is what you will remember and what will truly make it your home.
Katie, I was so glad to read your blog post on my lunch break today. I have to admit I was getting a little concerned for the lack of mojo goin’ on in your new place and was thinking that I might have to come give you a little shake on my next trip home. I love reading your blog every day. It reminds me of all the pieces of home (Canton, GA) that I miss living way up here in Michigan. Keep up the great work!
Wow! This post was so timely for me. We left our 4 bedroom home in Florida nearly 2 years ago to move to Chicago for a job. We downsized to a one bedroom apartment, gave away everything that didn’t fit, and rented out our home to a family of 5. Just TODAY we received photos of the house, what it looks like, how they decorated, how they are caring for it, etc. And we were so thrilled to see all that they did and kept. My hand painted tree in the dining room is front and center on the wall. The family room sports a red wall that we used to actually have there, and painted green a few years ago. They found the paint and redid it. They are flying the flag on the flag pole we hated to leave. I just loved seeing it all, and knowing that they love the house and are caring for it so well. So you see, this post was just so timely. And emotional for me too. ‘Cause I love home. And a home to love.
I was kind of wondering if that was how you were feeling. 🙁 I am hoping that seeing the house with the new family will give you some closure and help you to learn to love your new home. I don’t blame you for being emotional one bit. Hugs xx
I’ve been reading your blog for awhile, but I think this is the first time I’ve ever commented. I just read this post and I’m sitting here teary eyed and sniffling. I don’t even know what I want to say… I just felt compelled to post something.
The last few months, since you’ve moved into the new house…. the decorating and diy posts have been pretty scarce. And yet…. I check in here everyday. I love reading about Will and Jeremy… looking at all the photos… reading your thoughts and feelings about whatever is happening on a particular day. You are funny and sweet and a little weird… and I love that. I love how you love your family. It comes thru in every post you make and every photo you share with us. That is what keeps me coming back everyday.
You have such a loving heart. That’s why it’s hard to let go of your first house. But it’s also why you will fall in love with your current one, and you will make it a home for your family.
Okay… so now I feel weird and kinda stalkerishly creepy…. so I’m going to blow my nose and go find a decorating blog that talks about paint or tile or something.
Oh… one more thing.
I’d tackle Will’s room first. Get rid of othat horrendous paint before he’s old enough to remember it. 😉
hehe… speaking of cars- we sold my car a year and a half ago to buy a minivan and and found out later that the new owner of the car wrecked it 3 times in the first year. (the driver was fine though) Poor sad car…
Hey Katie!
Not sure what to write here, but this is how I responded to your post: http://commontomoms.blogspot.com/2011/08/motivation.html
Thanks for being vulnerable and writing from your heart. You made me search mine a little deeper.
Love, Rachel
And PS- I agree with Karen about tackling Will’s room first 🙂
Oh my goodness, I had tears in my eyes reading this! How wonderful that you got to see your first home again, and even more wonderful that there’s a sweet family who is obviously taking great care of it. I loved it so much when you lived there, and it’s fun to see it so different, but still so beautiful!
My husband and I bought our first home together about a year and a half ago and have poured tons of time and work into making it ours. It’s in no way big enough for a family, so when we decide to have children, we’ll be looking for a new house. It already makes me sad to think of leaving the house that we came home to after our honeymoon, that’s kitchen floor was installed by our own hands, and that has witnessed our entire marriage thus far. I’m savoring every minute we have here, because I know I’ll miss it when the time comes to move on!
Oh, and I meant to add that I can only hope we find a buyer who loves our first home the same way we did like you obviously have. What a blessing!
Katie,
Just wanted to let you know that I get what you mean. My husband and I had 4 years in our first house. We moved out of state and got into our first house. We got engaged in that house. We were married while we owned that house and registered for things to fill it. We made it feel like home even though we were far away from “home.” Luckily, I had two things that helped me that you don’t have. First, we didn’t yet have our daughter when we lived there. Second, we moved 12 hours away when we sold it. Also wanted to let you know that you and Sherry are my distractions and inspirations on a daily basis. Coincidentally, I have a daughter about to turn 1, and we bought a new old house in April (and I’m still struggling to decorate/organize it, since I’m a work at home Mom but I certainly don’t make my money on my blog… sure wish I did so I could actually get some diy projects and stuff around the house done). Keep working on your house so you can inspire me to do mine! Thanks!
I actually have reverse feelings. I knew our first home would only be temporary (we built it knowing we would move in 2 years) so it never felt like “home.” Our new house felt like “home” the first night we moved in mainly because I plan on being here for the long haul.
Good luck with the home making!
I’ve been living in our new home for 14 months now and felt the same way, I’ve decorated every room in the house but still didn’t feel like it was home. Then one day I took some art down and started filling my walls with pictures of our babies, and vacations and birthday parties. Memories that will help make this home start making more memories. It took some time but I am just now feeling like this is home.
I’m so glad that I’m not the only one out there that holds onto a house, and realizing that I’m not and reading your post will hopefully help. Good luck in your new home with your family keep the good stuff coming, I love following your blog…
Darn you, KB. Now I’m crying. And mussing my new Lancome makeup. And looking a hot mess and a half.
But, I’m glad that you’re finding closure. Crazy the things we hold on to, huh? 🙂
Virtual hugs.
JT
I don’t even know you Katie but I’m proud of you – follow your heart and your family, go love that great big bruised whale of yours. Isn’t it amazing how our tiny little people can teach us so much without even knowing it? Home for them is where-ever you are. Just wait, in a while, little by little you will wake up and feel at home.
Love that saying, “this too shall pass.” Praying that you find peace and comfort in your new home. For as many pictures as you take you should have lots to choose from to hang. Now go get hanging and turning that house into a home!
I enjoyed your post very much. Our first home [where we brought all of our children home from the hospital] was a mobile home. We desperately wanted a ‘house’–permanent, building value, unmovable… Many years later we have that. I love our first stick built ‘house’ but it is our second ‘home’. Home is where memories are made, life is lived, children are raised. We have had so much fun redoing things here, adding this and that. When I think back to our trailer, I don’t remember all the “I wish we could get out of here” so much. I remember bath times, bed times, stories, and a crawling baby having dumped an entire box of rice krispies on the kitchen floor. Memories are the scrapbooks we carry with us all the time, adorned with all the emotion of the moment, passion of the times. So, I will cherish those years, those pages and live where God places me with joy. Be blessed in your new home….make it yours whether by paint, lighting, or a box of carefully strewn rice krispies.
I absolutely love this house!!!! Tears are rolling now!… I am in awe of you Katie! You inspire me in so many ways! Keep letting your light shine! I pray that we grow old and gray here, if not… I pray we make long lasting memories to take anywhere! You guys have done a wonderful job here and the love is felt in the details. Proud to call this house our “home”! God Bless and keep you close XOXO
You go Katie!!!!! So proud of you!! Can’t wait to see what this new enthusiasm brings us.
Oh my gosh this made me tear up. Dang pregnancy hormones! We’ve lived in our one bedroom apartment for three years and are moving out next month. I know I will cry like a big baby!
Those same emotions in this post are a huge reason that I have started my own blog. It took me a long while to stop thinking of this house as someone else’s. A few months ago, on a trip with just my husband, I burst into tears during Miranda Lambert’s song, the house that built me. I thought of my kids and how this house is building them. So I will make it the best for them ~ and I know that I have some building left for me to do too.
you totally tugged at my heart strings. and you’re right, it temporary. also that d gets to have that home because you decided its so. what a blessing to have a part of a nice place for kids to be. i hope that makes sense.
anyway, thanks a lot for making me cry you turd.
Wow I missed a few days of posts and had to catch up and now you have me in tears. Ironically I had been away visiting my parents at my childhood home and also did a drive by my old home before I got married and bought our current house. I do like our current home but I feel like you do about your former home. The difference is if I had a the opportunity I would move back to my old home in a heartbeat. The thing is I thought I wanted and needed this nice big fancy house to start our family when in fact we were a family in our much smaller and manageable house. I hope I can move on like you have. but if my husband said to me right now lets go back I wouldn’t even think twice.
Oh my gosh. Sitting here on a Friday night catching up on blogs and now I’m bawling (balling?). It’s great D is taking great care of the old house, and can’t wait to see the new house transform into y’alls home. 🙂
This was beautiful! I think that package being “accidentally” sent to your old home was also part of an answer to prayer. God’s timing is SO perfect. 🙂
p.s. I think I saw your evil twins minus Will in the Pittsburgh Ikea yesterday. Or maybe it WAS you and Jeremy. In which case I take back that “evil” part. 😉
haha! Nope not us…you must have seen our cosmic twins! hope they were making us proud by not purchasing ugly stuff 🙂
xo – kb
What a great post – I am tearing up. I feel the same way everytime I move, even if it is just out of an apartment I’ve lived in for 6 months. But you are so right, your home is where the people you love are:) You will make your new home just as amazing as your old one!
I GET you! I teared up, dreading the move from our family home – which probably will not be for another 18 years. But this house is like family. Thank you for a lovely post. And I saw you on NATE and loved it! I didn’t know that was you!
I’m bawling….histerically. Must.get.a.grip….
Love this post, that is all
I could have sworn this post was me talking.. that is exactly how i feel about the house me and my fiance bought back in Feb. We lived in our apt 4 yrs before that and even though it was just an apt we feel like its more home than this house. We had so many good memories, and i really miss some of the set up in the apt compared to our new house. But i do like our house and i love owning something and being able to do whatever i want to it because its mine. This post really helped me deal with my issues and hope i continue to try to make this new house my own.
I usually check every so often just to giggle at your twisted sense of humor…but your thoughts in this post hit home with me. We moved into a new home just under a year ago from what I will always think of as my heart house. Leaving that tiny, 1000sf, 1930’s ranch with tons of history, character, giant trees, and memories was so uber difficult….especially b/c we moved into a suburbian, EVERYTHING beige home in a new neighborhood with ZERO character!
But my 2 year son doesn’t remember the old house (even with the canvas painting of it on the mantel)…so our new home needs to be our only home.
There are few downsides to loving your space as much as it seems you do (and I relate), but leaving a space that is the visual representation of your soul is hard. Especially b/c as a working mom with a toddler…I look a hot mess 95% of the time…but, I’ll be damned if my house doesn’t look fab!
Well said Katie. We are excited to follow along on your mission. Home is where your family is, and clearly, that is what matters most to you.
xoxo,
Jen
Loved this post! I was thinking recently that I would love to see what the new residents have done with your old house, so this was fun. But more importantly, I’m happy that you are on a mission with your new house! We have been in our second home for over 2 years, and have been working hard to update it. It finally feels like home to me, and it’s mainly because we have changed so much of it to make it our own. And I’m happy for us, that we get to see your progress! 🙂
Katie, I think providence brought me to this post today, three days after I said a tearful good-bye to our home of twenty-five years. (Yes, the tears are still flowing almost non-stop.). This was the home where we brought our babies home from the hospital, watched them learn to walk down the halls, head to kindergarten for the first time, pose for prom pictures in the garden, and pack their cars to leave for college and the big world. Our home was the center of our world, our life, and leaving it is harder than I ever imagined it would be.
We are following our dream to a place thousands of miles away – a small town in Alaska, where we are building a new home which we hope to fill with new memories while still cherishing the old. My babies are spread across the country now, and I have to keep reminding myself that change and growth is a necessary part of life, and it will all work out in the end. Still, it is so very hard.
Thanks for your words of comfort.
I want you to know that this post is the first post of your blog that I’ve ever read –
I know none of the backstory –
and I my eyes are totally welling up with tears –
It touched me, and I’m not even sure why.
Maybe I’m a total sap, but I stumbled across this post and cried my way through it. Especially the end, where you talk about Will not recognizing it. We chose to leave our home a couple of years ago to move closer to family and a better job. It was the house we came home to after our wedding, sat around the dinner table and talked about starting a family, brought our eldest child home to, watched her learn to sit, crawl, stand, and start walking . It makes me sad, but their lack of recognition makes it easier in a way.
I totally agree about your first house, you love it you miss it, but you can’t go back. It is bitter sweet. We are moving again next week for the 5th time in the last 4 years. I still have the same feelings, they are always there. Our next house will be with one less child as our kids begin to leave home, I will be so sad to see it happen.
Thank you for this post.
I’ve only just started reading your blog and decided to randomly pick an older one to “catch up” with, and this is the one and it really resonates with me. I had bought a condo back before I ever even knew my husband existed. I painted it, put a couple of pictures on some of the walls, but it was just the place that I came back to at the end of a very long work day. 5 years later I had a husband, but the condo was still someplace we just both came back to at the end of the work day (with a lot more stuff… the joy of combining households). After my son was born, it started to feel more like a home, but it was a home that we’d outgrown and we had to move. We now live in a beautiful new built townhouse that looks exactly like every other one in the 3 surrounding counties. But this is where my son learned to walk. This is where he “discovered” stairs and joy of climbing up them. This is where we hosted the family x-mas for the first time (16 people around two tables only meant to hold 6 each). I’m going to take a leaf from your book and start working on making this place my family home. Thank you.
There is nothing like your first home. I know I will shed a tear when we move on to our 2nd home next year! *sniffle sniffle*
This post inspired a post on my blog about the moment when it finally dawned on me that I was home. We are in our version of our first house, but I moved straight from my parents’ house, where I was raised, to my husband’s house, where he had already lived for two years prior to our wedding. Even though I’d spent a lot of time at his house and put a lot of effort into decorating, it just didn’t feel like home until about two weeks ago.
Since your original post was written well over year ago, are you feeling more at home in your current house than you felt when you originally wrote this?
Absolutely. I think bringing home Weston to our current house and to seeing Will react to the rental vs our house was so encouraging and just reinforced the fact that our current abode is really home 🙂
xo – kb
I totally get it. And like I said in another post, this difficulty of letting me go is keeping me stuck in our current house, keeping us from moving on. Another BIG thing for me is that there’s so much to do. I’m not near done. There’s so much in my mind that I picture that I want to see come to fruition. I’m even afraid no one would want it because they dont see what I see.
A personal question you don’t have to answer… one thing that also holds me back is I really dont want to be responsible for anything that goes wrong. I want to move about an hour away. I’m not going to want to take the time to come and fix this or that or pay for someone else to do it. Is there a third party business that can take care of anything for you- like you rent a landlord and dont worry about a thing? A flat rate fee regardless? A dreamer can dream I guess…
Damnit. Now all those thoughts I had laid to bed are stirring again! I just think if i could do 1-10 I might be able to let go…
my poor husband.