And then I punched my steering wheel.
That’s what ended up happening.
Let me begin with the whole story. I was in a foul mood last week. Yup. The whole week. It felt hormonal or maybe like I had drank a touch too much of the crazy juice and then it was fed by some very minor things…things not even worth mentioning because I would explain it like it was a big deal and those of you out there with normal capacity for compassion would have trouble hiding your eyes as you found them rolling in their sockets. Then you would do an extra-long blink to hide the why-is-this-even-a-topic-of-discussion-eye-roll and just look like you fell asleep in the middle of the conversation. Those of you with that weird uncanny your-problem-is-my-problem kinda empathy (you know the type…like if you have a hangnail…let’s stop everything and pray for you and cry with you and discuss the entire story of how said hangnail came to be kinda type.) are very kind but I know in my heart that it truly wasn’t a big deal and there are far more dire folks out there with far more desperate hangnail situations. Then I would feel guilty for eating up your time. And frankly…you over-empathizers are needed in todays world of aggressive hangnails.
So this story went like this…I was in a foul mood. I had to drop off some brownies at our church and I made the point of going directly after dropping off Will at preschool. I figured that if I was super early…I would avoid all human beings. I threw Weston in a cute outfit (these days that means just something that is clean) because the plan was to snap some photos of him at 10 months old and with his current hairstyle (I want to buzz off the ‘butt-cut’ but only after it’s properly documented). After dropping off Will, the car is loaded, I hand the Munchkin (that’s his current nickname…Munchkin or Munch or Munchie…which fits because the kid eats like a Hoover)…I hand him a squeeze pack of baby food like I’ve done a bazillion times, and I head down the road toward the church listening to him make his happy little squeals and sighs.
I pull up…still in a mood…and I look back to see that Munch has squeezed the entire sweet potato, apple and cinnamon mixture out of the pouch onto himself, his car seat, Will’s car seat, the car and the floor. And he is now screaming…which means the thunder down under is in the forecast, if you know what I mean.
And then I punched my steering wheel.
It was such a little thing. And definitely not worth the moment of blinding pain in my hand as I remember that I didn’t clip my fingernails and now there was four little almost-puncture wounds in my palm.
Do you ever get there? Like you are holding on by one thin thread of sanity and you might snap at any moment? I literally do not want to bite people’s heads off right now…I want to eat their entire upper half. I want to mash their cranium into their torso, reach in, tear out their tongues and then dramatically throw it onto the ground and grind it into the dirt with my heel. My mother is rolling her eyes. I can feel it through the internet.
Lately I’ve just been so bitter salty and then the littlest thing sends me over the edge…aka food pouch and a crying baby.
After cleaning up the car and Weston, I grab the foil and plastic encased food and take it inside the front doors of the church…walking really really fast when Brian, our pastor and friend pops his head into the foyer and says HI! All I could think was…why the heck is he here so early?! Doesn’t he know that I am trying to avoid human contact for the sake of not committing homicide?! I’m pretty sure Jesus frowns upon murdering your pastor in your church…even if you do leave the brownies.
I don’t think my legs have ever moved so fast….I threw a half-hearted hi over my shoulder and headed for the car. He knew something was wrong and asked if I was okay…
I had made it to the sidewalk but not far enough to pretend I didn’t hear him…so I spun on my heal and basically yelled…
“I’M PREGNANT AND HORMONAL!”
and walked briskly off.
Thanks Brian for taking one for the team. Jeremy probably appreciates it more than anyone. Oh and in attempt to get into a better mood, I stopped at a local shop called the Stone Mountain Pecan Company and picked up three pounds of chocolate covered food and took a couple dozen photos of Munchie. They have a killer pumpkin display.
Needless to say…the chocolate helped. The photos of Weston? They changed things for me…at least for this moment. And my steering wheel? It works just fine 🙂
I was there last week. I was so mad I smacked a door as hard as I could on my way through… I’m still a little surprised it didn’t hit the wall and come right back in my face. Sometimes work+baby+husband+life= too much in the moment… then I see my smiling baby and realize things are a lot better than I think… but sometimes I need the hurt hand to realize that.
I don’t usually comment on blogs ( I’m a shy one until you get it know me) .. But, thank you. I’ve has those moments countless times in the last 2 years .. And most people don’t get it. But, I feel much less crazy. .. And that’s saying something!
I’m laughing at you and feeling for you all at the same time. At least you can rationalize irrational behavior with pregnancy hormones. 10 months postpartum… I’m milking it to say the least. We’ve all been there, but I agree one little smile at the right moment can change the entire course of the day, and boat loads of chocolate always helps too.
I definitely have those moments – lately about cleaning up the kitchen floor after my two boys (4 and 2) “eat” aka crumble and smear food everywhere. It makes me want o cry and punch something some days – and I’m not even pregnant. Praise God for his grace, amen?
Katie,
I so get where you are coming from! I’m not pregnant right now, so I don’t have those hormones coursing through my body (I know just how real and powerful they are though!), but I act the same way sometimes. Sometimes I’m just in a foul mood. I actually admire you for not trying to cover it up in front of your pastor. I might have been tempted to be fake and pretend like nothing was wrong, but I actually think its healthier to be real and say what’s on your mind. Hopefully, people will be understanding and kind.
1. Weston is so adorable! I love the fall display, so ready for it to feel like fall in Texas! 2. I’m 14 1/2 weeks pregnant and have a very active 18 month old son, I totally get the hormones and attitude, I am right there with you!!!
I love the last picture posted the best, shows the whole set up and it looks like he is so happy and giving you a wink……sorry Mom for the drama, Really love this pumpkin thing going on!
Been there. I think sleep is the key to sanity. And saying no to the brownie making :).
You crack me up. Love this post. You make my days better!
I can’t even tell if that shirt’s dirty or not! Those pictures are adorable (as always). Sweet potatoes and all, these pictures are keepers! (And I feel ya on the steering wheel, btw.)
I totally get it and I’m not pregnant!
Seriously I am dying this is high quality mommy moments that only mommy’s can relate and laugh at. Well said Katie Bower Well Said!
I can totally relate! I’m relieved to hear I’m not the only one barely hanging on to sanity sometimes. There needs to be an “I’m pregnant and hormonal” t-shirt.
Not to break out the old wives tales, but maybe this baby is a girl? My husband says (in the nicest way possible) that I was way more moody when pregnant with my girls than their brother.
I am putting in a guess right now that the bun in the oven is a girl! After 3 boys I gave birth to a girl 6 months ago and I think I’m still apogizing for my crazy pregnancy moments 🙂 Hope this week is a bit better for you.
That last one made me grin – he is such a cutie. And that is saying something at 12:22am while I am using my cricut to cut out birthday party decorations for my second son’s 2nd birthday (can you say that three times fast?) next month.. Did I mention that I may or may not be pregnant and hormonal as well – waiting one more day and testing but oh goodness.
Cross your fingers for me.
Love this post because I totally relate. Here’s what I do when I’m in a funk: paint my toenails blue. Seriously, it helps. Then, when I find myself spinning out of control, I can at least look at my tootsies and think about how my toes are already blue, so I don’t need to be. Try it, you’ll see. 😉
xo Marianne
The kid is worth it. He’s really adorable! Hopefully everyone can read this and be inspired by you.
hello katie!
this is exactly what i love best about your blog. you’re not afraid to share when you have one of those moments. i punched my wardrobe the other morning..so yes i am there at least once a week. thanks for making us other mothers feel normal.
dina (all the way from Malaysia)
Oh I get it another boy … Oh well at least you’ll get a baby some of us not so lucky
Buck up you don’t always get your favourite flavour sometimes the flavour available is just as good
I love all the comments it’s like “crazy {but totally legit} women unite!” town over here 🙂
You make me happy Katie. I love that you know your craziness is momentary and you can share it with everyone!
every.day. lately. It’s nice to read a post where we get to see how human you are since most of us dream up that you’re super woman/mom/wife. At least you have a bun in the oven to “blame”~ Hang in there!
I was in the same mood yesterday, (and unfortunately it carried over a little bit this morning) but after seeing the pictures of your sweet little one, it definitely improved my mood too! Thanks for sharing!
We’ve all been there – pregnancy hormones or not. I get my frustrations out by pounding the pavement during a run. There are times where I just come into my house and immediately walk upstairs and isolate myself from all other human beings. My hubs gets it and he’s more than happy to give me my space… and a latte.
You’re human – SHOCKER! Don’t be so hard on yourself and realize that you’re normal.
http://jax-and-jewels.blogspot.com
Hang in there!
P.S. I love that Weston is a little ginger baby. Too cute!
Men will never understand. 😉
http://happinessiscreating.com/
I hope you’re having a better week this week Katie. I can see why those pictures helped with some smiles – what a sweet little dude! Sending love your way xo
My son Will has been “Munchie” since he was a day old…love your boys, they are adorable!! Hang in there, I’m sure it will get better!
Been there. Yesterday was my “I’m pregnant and I just am NOT IN THE MOOD FOR ANY OF THIS” day. I told my husband that I was uncomfortable, grumpy, exhausted, and even my bad hair made me want to cry. I thought a million times during the work day yesterday about going to my boss and telling her I was taking sick leave, but somehow I made it through. Went straight home, took a hot shower, got in stretchy clothes, and then did the bare minimum for the rest of the evening.
Don’t be so hard on yourself. This too shall pass 🙂
Caroline- were you not told as a child, if you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say anything at all? You are just rude.
So I am in graduate school to become a mental health counselor and that “let me bite your hangnail for you” empathy is real. I should know, I experience it everyday practicing counseling! Empathy for the win!
One of my favorite sayings goes something like this…”love me when I least deserve it, because that is when I need it the most”.
It is really hard to be in a bad mood for no apparent reason and not have others judge or condemn you for it. It’s a very lonely place to be.
Those pics would turn me right around too. Weston is super adorable and it sure is hard to be mad when you’ve got that thousand watt smile coming back at you.
I hope you are back on track this week. And thanks for sharing the good, bad and ugly. It’s real life, yo.
I can relate. I have 8 weeks left. Maybe I won’t kill anyone between now and then. 😉
I can totally relate… but I am not a puncher, I am a screamer. Everything will build, build, build, then BOOM!! I will either let out a earth-shaking scream in the car or master closet (I feel like the neighbors won’t hear me from those places, no idea why).
Do what you need to to let it out, sister… it’s better for you, the baby, and probably the family too 🙂
Oh, and Weston is SO CUTE!!! He has so much red in his hair. Great pics!
Like always, your photos are gorgeous!
girl. been there; punched things.
keep on breathing. 🙂
I love how you just went off on your pastor! LOL! That definitely signals a bad week when you do that. I really do hope your hormones give you a break though. If it makes you feel any better this week pretty much sucks for me. I am back to work full-time after being off for 7 weeks of maternity leave, welcoming our second baby (a girl). I want to stay home with my babies but it’s not possible. We kinda need to pay for colleges and keep health insurance. LOL So…it could be worse?!
I feel like that more days than I’d like to admit. My poor kids having to deal with me on edge. I have a toddler and an infant around the same age as Will and Weston and I have grand plans to be a great mom… then I snap. Thank God His mercies are new each day… I sure do need them.
I never comment. But I had to today. I feel like a crazy stalker but – I love you Katie! You keep it so real. I so wish I lived in Georgia. We have the same sarcastic sense of humor. Keep doing what you’re doing. There are thousands of us who don’t usually comment – because we are busy with our babes and other mommy duties – but we are still here! Reading your posts. Changing our pants because our mommy bladders no longer hold our per when we laugh uncontrollably. And then anxiously await your next post. Love you kb! That’s it!
I just love you. That is all. (thanks for being so honest and making the rest of us feel a little more normal!)
I call this phenomenon Having A Day. We don’t have kids yet, but I do balance work, and school, and a husband, and fixing up a house–and sometimes it’s just a lot. I’ll get crabby and sensitive for no reason, and beware anyone who has to be around me. But then it passes and I’m fine. Weird, but we’re not alone. 🙂
I know you’re crazy busy with Will, Weston, Jeremy, and cupcakes, but can you please please do another pregnancy timeline photoshoot? Please please!
It might not be “hitting a steering wheel” but we’ve all had those days. Especially when pregnant. It will get better. Eat chocolate and take a mommy break. You deserve it! 🙂
Two weeks ago I was in the middle of a stressful week preparing for a big night for our women’s ministry. Halfway through the week I got a FB message that was sent to a bunch of people asking for people to bring something to contribute to the food. Internally, I just snapped. I couldn’t even respond with a polite, “sorry, I can’t this time!” because I just wanted to scream that I could NOT handle even ONE more thing. I had a hard enough time just not bursting into tears at my desk. So I feel ya.
I often find myself having these moments at 5:45 pm in downtown Ft Lauderdale rush hour gridlock when I’ve worked a full day and now have a hungry and tired 10 month old in the backseat who has a sudden disinterest in all of his toys and snacks. You’re not alone, and hangnail or serious life crisis…remember to give yourself a break and allow yourself to have a moment or two, you’re human. <3
Oh my goodness Katie, you just described my week as well! I am glad I am not the only one that has these types of days/weeks 🙂 Thanks for bringing a smile to my face! 🙂
Katie!!!! I am totally with you on this and I’m not even pregnant. I like to blame it on the changing seasons 🙂
Thanks for keeping it real and sharing some sweet baby photos! Keep ’em coming!
I’ve been there. Especially while pregnant with our third child. He’s now 6.5 months old. His two big brothers (barely 6 and almost 3) have spurred on those feelings many times. Or at least they’ve contributed to “the last straw”. I’ve had many days like that but then the next day comes (or several days later) and something changes and all is right in the world again. Those homicidal tendencies get replaced by a perfectly timed little boy hug or helpful spouse or kind word from a friend. I hope you get all of those helpful moments spaced out at just the right times to keep you balanced. Hormones are from the devil and need to be banished. Until that miracle happens, hang in there and keep looking forward to a less crab-ass time… it’ll come! I wish I could hug you because that always helps me. Grab the closest kid and have him squeeze the grumps out! 🙂
We are reading a book in my bible study right now called unglued. It has made me realize that these outbursts are completely normal and it has been so refreshing to hear from other Christian women that nope, I’m not alone. We all do it and it doesn’t make us a bad mom, wife, daughter, sister, etc. it just makes us human.
Katie I definitely think you are having a girl this time around, but you never know. Sending you hugs all the way from New York. I was extremely moody when I was pregnant with my daughter and after that I had 3 boys and had that pregnancy glow and felt great, but when I with my daughters pregnancy I was a fire breathing pregnant dragon!
OMG He is looking more and more like Will! And does he have a touch of red in his hair?
Thanks for keeping it real KB! Been there, felt that way!
I hear ya momma.
I’ve been there, lady. I just typed and deleted the sentence “Do the best you can and God will do the rest” but I don’t like that. Just let God lift you up. period. It sounds cliché, but it has been really great for me to remember the past few weeks.
On a lighter note, I love the idea of taking the kiddos to a pretty outdoor fall display and taking pictures! I will now load the munsters in the minivan and cruise around town looking for the best one.
Lots of love coming your way, Katie Bower!
Thanks for keeping things real on your blog, and helping all of us feel a little less crazy. I’m 14 weeks pregnant with my fourth, so I can totally relate!!! “Chocolate covered food” is probably the best thing I’ve ever read. Love ya, girl!
Katie you are SO funny. You should do stand-up comedy on the side!!!
And I totally feel you. I feel ridiculously hormonal constantly and I’m not even pregnant at the moment. We played a newlywed type game one night and my husband was asked to describe me in one word….yeeeeeah….”crazy” was his response, haha! The sad thing is I guessed right on his answer so I’m fully aware of the state of my mind. I have these type moments at least once a week. I just try to find a happy spot to decompress. And yeah chocolate does help!
Katie-
Nearly every friend that I have was blessed with a baby in the past year. My very closest friend’s son was born in June. Up until she delivered, not only were we friends but we were also coworkers. For nine months, I was continually shocked by the way that she behaved at work and in public. Throughout a fairly non-problematic pregnancy, she was angry and disrespectful all under the guise of “pregnancy hormones.”
Because I’ve never had a baby, the masses are going to cry out that it’s not my place to comment. So let me go ahead and get it out there: I can’t begin to imagine the stress that accompanies pregnancy. I speculate that it’s an incredibly strange, unnerving, surreal time. I just want everyone to know that there are so many women in this world that yearn for a healthy pregnancy with all of its strange, unnerving, surreal moments. It’s unfortunate that some women toss around the term “pregnancy hormones” like it’s an affliction.
I’ve been reading your blog since before Will was born, so I know that you are completely grateful for your children and your pregnancy. I’ll keep good thoughts that your mood shifts and that the blessings in your life make your days brighter.
I hear ya mama! I feel like you just described 75% of my life. I work with my hubby AND bring our 20 month old to work with me…. should I go on? I don’t think I really need to 🙂
…LOTS of steering wheel punching goin on over here.
A couple of weeks ago… no wait that was last week, anyway I was so mad that as I was putting dishes away I took the stainless steel pan and slammed it as hard as I could flat on the counter top! I hear ya girl! Sometimes you just get so mad. When I realized what I had done I felt terrible but the counter top and pan are just fine and so am I!
Hang in there!
Weston is a doll! Love his expression in the last photo with the two front teeth!
I throw things. I’ve broken many phones and remotes (and even my kindle – that SUCKED) over the years. I don’t throw them AT anyone (usually – my husband has great reflexes anyway) but there’s something so satisfying about chucking something across the room as hard as you possibly can. Once I do that, I’m totally fine. My husband thinks we should set up a corner in the basement where I can chuck cheap Goodwill glassware against the cinderblock when I’m hormonal, lack patience and am unreasonably emotional. It would probably be cheaper 😉
Do what you have to do to get through those days and then move on. Hang in there! 😉
Katie,
I really appreciate you. You put into words what I can’t even start to express. I’m successfully pregnant after suffering loss and heart break in that area and you put into words the emotions I feel on any given day. You help me to remember to be grateful and God has a bigger picture than we can ever understand. So thank you, thank you, thank you.
Sincerely,
Megan
I get that way too! There’s no point in explaining how you got there – it just makes you feel silly. Doesn’t mean that you don’t need to punch the steering wheel though.
Love all the pictures of Weston, but that last one is adorable 🙂
In an effort to explain to my husband why I get rage-y the way I do sometimes, I directed him to this helpful illustration by another blogger:
http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/05/sneaky-hate-spiral.html
I sincerely hope this week is so much better for you!
Road rage, roid rage, all that has got nuttin on preggo rage. I lived it and I can vouch for you. And the fact that chocolate fixes things, that too.
Gorgeous photos Katie! Here’s to a fresh start to a happier week 🙂
<— also pregnant and hormonal! I asked my hubs to bring home key lime pie last night, and instead he brought home ben and jerry's, thinking I'd like that better. I almost cried, and almost punched him. Totally stupid, but there it is! Thank god for chocolate and photos of adorable babies 😀
Love reading your blog!! You tell it like it is, which is so refreshing!!! It makes us all feel a little more normal. Weston is such a happy kids!!! Does he have red hair?
Sometimes the world conspires against us, and, wel… we need to let it (the world) know that is not ok!
ps. I’m not pregnant, not married, childless, and only have the normal hormones in me…
Hey – pregnant or not, we’ve all been there! But I hope you are having a better day today. 🙂 Weston is a such a beautiful boy…these cute pictures could cheer anyone up!
I can sympathize, but my racing hormones are at the other end of the spectrum, with hot flashes added to the mix. Hang in there – it’s only temporary! Adorable pictures of the munchkin.
And you have the cutest sons ever. You could post pictures of Weston every day and I would be happy. I’ve never seen a baby with such an infectious smile. I have no doubts that boy is going to do amazing things with his life.
Uh……..What? I don’t think KB mentioned anywhere in this post that she found out she was having another boy, or has ever mentioned that having another boy would be upsetting? I believe that the whole gist of this post is simply that she has two kids and is pregnant, and hormonal, and we pregnant women sometimes over-react or reach the end of our ropes for silly things (Being in the third trimester with a toddler, I very very much relate).
Seriously, did I miss like an entire paragraph here, or am I taking crazy pills?
A touch!
xo – kb
haha…I don’t why but the kindle line made me literally laugh out loud.
xo – kb
It was probably the full moon!
And that fourth picture of Weston…I die. SO cute!!! xo
Keep’n it real. I respect that more than you know. I have had many of those days. Luckily they pass and only come around every so often. Empathizing and sympathizing!!! 😉
seriously laughed out loud just now.
I totally get this way. More often than I should. I love that you are honest about it. I feel ya girl and btw, I call my daughter Munchie. I have since she was born…. 🙂 I hope you have an awesome day!
I love how you share REAL. Been there, felt that.
Man – I’ve had those days before and I’m not (nor have I ever been) pregnant. At least you have a perfectly acceptable excuse and it makes for a good read on my lunch break 🙂
Thanks for the post.
Em
yup. Can totally relate. I’m not preggers by any stretch of the imagination! My kiddos are 19 & 10 yrs old but I have those days/weeks! Thanks for helping us all feel a little more normal 🙂
I love these “normal” posts. The gripping details kept my attention. 😉 So much so, I forgot what I was doing. And burned my corndogs. Life is beautiful. Even when it isn’t.
Adorable pics of Weston! All’s well that ends well!
I agree with Trish R – your kids are unreal. THE CUTEST.
Post birth, I almost stabbed my husband to death over a breast-feeding debate. In fact, if I had had a knife in my hand at the time, I probably would have stabbed him. I still remind him of that to this day. Ahhhhhh…so close to prison, and yet, I’m otherwise a good person! Mostly. 🙂
On the way to my sons band concert my toddler thought it would be fun to try and swallow her whole hand! She puked all over herself the car and the car seat. I happened to be an exit away from babies r us. I pulled into the parking lot, stripped the baby, handed her to my son then proceeded to unbuckle the carseat and tossed it as hard as I couldn’t out of the car! It was a Britax (I needed to say that lol) tossing that puke covered baby seat did make me feel better, but then the naked baby needed clothes so there I was with no spare clothes, it’s 50 degrees out and I’m walking into BRU with a baby wearing nothing more then a diaper, a 5 year old and my poor 11 year old son who is crying because he is afraid he will miss his concert. Not my best day! But within 15 minutes I had a new carseat and the baby in some new pj’s and my son didnt miss the concert……..so I get it, I totally get it!!!
Katie,
I’m a hangnail kinda gal. I have 3 kids and the feeling happens more then I want to admit. and i’m not pregnant…. but have my period…(now I’m all TMI)
Thanks for making me laugh. Keep your head up lady, you are a stellar mommy, beautiful, and allowed to have days like these.
Thinking of you.
The song, “My mama said there would be days like this pops into my head.” My son did the same thing with his packet of food the other day. I have never been pregnant (our son is adopted), but I do know how those specifically hard, overly hormonal days with an almost 1 year old can be. Thanks for blogging about your experience though : ) It helps the rest of us steering wheel banging mamas know we aren’t the only ones.
Punching bags in the garage work too : )
oh man. i DO know what you’re talking about. thank you for sharing. it’s as if even though you are in a ‘mood’ and can capture sweet moments on film you should be that sweet all the time. yes, i’m still thankful. yes, i needed something to ‘treat myself’. yes, that somehow helped. yes, i pray to Jesus that my mind will be transformed. yes, i love my babes (and husband)… but sometimes- the four kids with little things either one after another ,or all at the same time, can make a momma’s head hurt trying to get it all done well and right. 🙂
love this blog. big prayers your way. lets hope the funk is gone. 🙂
this.is.hilarious.
Oh my. I’m never happy when people feel like poop on a stick but I am seriously glad I am not the only one who does. I was like this two weeks ago, work is super stressful, it was that time of the month, there wasn’t enough chocolate and Dr. Pepper on the planet to mollify me. I’m pretty sure I threatened to rip a throat out of someone talked to me.
Then I went home to puppy kisses and comfy clothes and took a hot bath and was a touch better.
I don’t normally respond to these things but…even if it’s a boy– she’s allowed to be disappointed. Gender disappointment is a real thing. What you just did is add to the negatively pervasive idea that “you should be happy no matter what because at least you have a baby.” There’s a serious issue going on and it’s about women treating other women like crap. Women need to support other women period.
These kinds of comments lend to the “mommy myth” and force more and more women into hiding their thoughts, feelings, emotions.
Gender disappoint does not equal ungrateful.
(P.S. This post was probably about something totally stacked up and she hit a wall.)
Not alone Katie Bower! Picture me (even though you have no clue what I look like) screaming in my car on my way to work. As. Loud. As. Possible. It helps. But I really think sometimes I just need to throw a tantrum like my 14-month old daughter does, it looks like relief. My favorite part of this post is reading what other people use for coping with stress, lol. Except for the Weston pics, so cute!
I totally get it. I had one of those explosive days a couple of weeks ago. There wasn’t anything particularly dire or significant, but the combination of several minor things proved to be too much for me to handle. That Wednesday culminated with me punching my steering wheel too, repeatedly because a woman cut me off during my commute home. That happens on a daily basis, but this particular day it seemed to be the end of the world for me. It was a good reminder for me to be gracious with myself–it’s okay to ask for help, it’s okay to be tired, it’s okay need chocolate. Luckily, we have a gracious Father despite our temper tantrums!
P.S. The line about Jesus frowning on…but leaving the brownies–cracked me up.
I am currently pregnant with my first and I cannot express how glad I am to know…it’s not just me! All the things make me so, so, so irrationally angry.
Im guessing our pumpkin patch conditions will be about the same as yours, do you mind giving a few tips for camera settings for outside like this? With a slightly moving 15 month old.. Feel free to direct me to a previous post if I missed something somewhere!!
hmmmm, I am thinking “girl”! You might have extra female hormones running with you now!
OK. I’m officially putting my vote in for your baby’s gender….GIRL. I only say this because I have two of each, which makes me qualified to make an official prediction. 😉 I was definitely more “even-keeled” with m boys. With my girls, I was so moody and hormonal, not to mention super-critical of my husband, our marriage, etc. I practically put us into counseling. You know, because not taking out the garbage while your wife is pregnant (with a girl) is almost grounds for separation! So very curious to find out this baby’s gender! 🙂 Oh and PS – I was more “in the mood” (wink wink) with my boy pregnancies. Way less interested in that sort of stuff while pregnant with my girls.
We’ve all been there. I’m still trying to get over something trivial that happened LAST YEAR. Pregnant hormones = emotional roller coaster… and I didn’t even know I was pregnant at that point. Thanks for the dose of reality, especially putting things into perspective because just thinking about what happened brings back the rage like it happened yesterday.
I just found out I am pregnant with my first yesterday.
Am I looking at a blog post of my future? 🙂
Happy chocolate-eating! Sounds ridiculously yummy.
Hi. You just described last week and the beginning of this week for me. At least you can blame it on being pregnant! I am just a hormonal, crabby biotch. With a 1.5 year old who is convinced she does not need to nap when the other two kids nap! I need to find some joy again. Hopefully soon!
You are a breath of fresh air. Thanks for being so authentic. I love to read myself in you!
You are just plain funny.
Omg, this is EXACTLY how I felt at the overcrowded grocery store today. I may have to quote you while I try to explain to my husband why I only got halfway through the shopping list…because I know his eyeballs will be rolling all over the place.
Thanks for expressing these feelings so perfectly and making me feel less insane, and for the Munchkin pics; they made me feel better too 🙂
Yes! Not preg, but started fertility medicine this summer (hoping to avoid hormones during school year, I teach K and wanted my new babies to meet me normal!). Got pregnant, but lost our baby right when school started. Trying again this month and have nothing left! I cry when my kids have a rough day and get so angry and annoyed at any adult who adds another thing to my to do list. The littlest things send me over the edge! Trying to remember where I put all of my empathy and understanding! Andy brain, lets be honest.
Congratulations girl!
Well, as much as I would like to guarantee it…there is no promises of terrible pregnancy hormones (I was perfectly happy with both boys!) and just to be frank…quite a mess even when I wasn’t preggo 🙂 You never know!
xo – kb
Well, this was a shaded covered porch and during the day time (10:30am ish) and I just set mine to about 400-800 ISO and then planted my f-stop at 2.2 because this was my 85mm and it requires me to be really far away (comparatively speaking)…and then did the shutter accordingly.
xo – kb
He does!
xo – kb
HA!!!
I KNOW, RIGHT! It’s like a window into my angry, disgruntled soul.
I definitely feel you. A recent discovery is that if I’m sad, knitting helps, but if I’m angry, frogging is the best thing! I buy sweaters from goodwill to take apart for the yarn. Frogging them, aka taking them apart into yarn, fulfills the destructive streak while doing something that needs doing.
My first pregnancy was like a sedative (girl), my second I was so angry(girl) and with my third I developed Tourettes (boy). You just never know. Sorry things are not going as smooth this time around. You know what will make you feel better….painting a faux brick wall!!!! I am dying to see it.
Oh girl I have been there! I am blaming the horrific last week on the full harvest moon. I swear the buzzards were circling all week. I have three daughters. Two that are teenagers who KNOW IT ALL and a tween who is unable to be quiet so I get your frustration. Sometimes things just don’t go your way and there’s nothing you can do about it.
So glad you are feeling better and hopefully the buzzards have quit circling you too!
Hugs!!
Thanks for keeping it real. I have days/ weeks like that all the time and I am not even pregnant and hormonal. Sometimes I just lock myself in my bedroom for several hours and sleep/ watch You Tube. Eventually my mood passes and I can go back to being normal mom.
I love you for owning you and helping us moms out here to know that the bloggy moms aren’t all perfect! Love you for that!
PS- Munch is a cutie!
Ahhh… hormonal anger. I have had my share of violent outbursts (objects only, no humans or dogs.) I have not had it in any of my 3 pregnancies. But, birth control? Watch out home accessories. One time I messed up a homemade pie crust and so I took the rolling pin and beat the tar out of the cutting board I was using. The cutting board cracked and now my dog hides in the guest room when I cook. Not kidding.
Photography questions :: do you custom white balance each time? do you have a custom style set on your camera? I mean, you’re a pro and all so obvi your photos are going to be excellent. I just love the color saturation/exposure balance you have going on. I always end up boosting color in post processing and I feel it looks fake.
Nope. I definitely auto white balance (unless my screen is showing some funky results that I know I will have to drastically fix later)….I did study up on the Kelvin method and used a gray card for a while when I was learning (I still haven’t scored an Expodisc but want to eventually) and found that with outdoor photos, auto requires just as much post processing as with Kelvin and gray carding. If I am indoors, I usually try to think first about whether or not these photos will be used later…some are just purely for blogging and some will actually be for family and be frame-worthy…so before I invest a lot of time on white balancing, I take that into consideration.
xo – kb
Oh no, I am sorry for laughing, but that is funny…the pastor?! And really, I think it is perfectly ok to feel frustrated and unhappy over the mess. That was a little more than a hangnail. It is hard to be pregnant and taking care of wee little ones at the same time. My two are about 22 months apart…so been there, done that, I commiserate.
Thank you. I adore your ability to share real stories from life.
I wish I could do it too and everyone could just laugh about it instead of looking at me with pity and insisting on telling me I’m in their prayers.
Its like, No. I realize these feelings and trials are fleeting, needing to vent and be real is not a cry for help. It’s a signal that says I’ve got this, but lets laugh about it anyway.
For me, laughing about something trying is the fastest remedy.
Girl – we all have bad days, weeks, months. Plus, you’re carrying a new life! You have an excuse! And those pics of Weston are totes adorbs!
You poor thing! I get like that now and don’t have a.) pregnancy, b.) two boys under four, and c.) church brownie duty to blame! It happens to all of us, so no worries. Plus, look at the bright side, you must have really, really strong nails! I would have gotten even angrier cause my nails would’ve broken clean off they’re so brittle!
Oh my good gracious about the squeeze pouches!!!! Sometimes those things are such a help (any portable toddler snack that meets a fruit/ veggie foodgroup is a godsend) BUT sometimes they are the match that lights my short fuse. Its always in the carseat on the way to somewhere that she squeezes the thing all over herself. Always. Gaaaah. I feel you mama. Also with the pregnancy rage. I could use a little expectant mother glow over here. Instead i have the crazy lady beet-red about to flip my lid going on. My poor husband. :/
Hormones make us do some crazy stuff. I screamed at my faucet in front of my husband and daughter awhile back. It needed to be replaced and was hard to work with. After I screamed at it, I burst into tears. He replaced it the next weekend. 🙂 Hormones happen.
Those pictures of Weston are adorable! Such a cutie patootie!
HAHA! Sometimes those faucets are just asking for it!
xo – kb
Oh my I am rolling with laughter yet also saying to myself “Oh yes, that’s me. That’s me, too. Yep that’s me. I’d do that too.” Sooooo glad to see I’m not the only one because despite my college education telling me I am not the only frustrated mom or human being out there, it often feels like it! Those doggone hormones! Or even no hormones – doesn’t matter. Sometimes those days are just those days and that’s it.
P.S. Glad your stearing wheel is ok – and I LOVE the shots in the pumpkins!
I have no pregnancy hormones and regularly do stuff like that… I might have broken a chunk of our wall off and the head of a bobble head in a fit about not being able to find my keys in the early morning rush. Being a mama is hard work but 100% worth every moment. When I got pregnant the first time my friend told me: “be prepared 80% is awful but that 20% of amazing makes it so worth it.” I have to remind myself of that sometimes.
Girl… I’ve been brought to tears by things as simple as a piece of pizza before and I’ve never even been pregnant. I am so with you on this one. Sometimes a million, tiny, should be insignificant but are kind of a pain in the buns things can be heavier than one, giant, legitimate problem. The eternal optimist in me wants to tell you to remind yourself it always could be worse, but the girl in me wants to tell you to go ahead and punch that steering wheel (or scream into that pillow as I do)… without bad days, there would be no great days!
Hilarious!
Hey it happens. We all get there, but pregnant with a toddler and a baby already gives you a ton of leeway. That bit about your pastor though? That’s funny stuff.
I hope you are having a better week! 😉
First- the next time this happens, we need a code word for you to text me and I can throw chocolate at you in the preschool line. And take Weston for a few minutes. And roll my eyes while being empathetic, but blatantly be trying to make you laugh. (Keep in mind, my Love Language is gifts, not words of affirmation, so I’ll say the wrong thing like an awkward turtle, but the chocolate will be top notch!)
Second- those pictures are amazing! I need to take the kids over next week for pics with the pumpkins! Coleman needs pumpkin pictures!!!
Hugs,
Ms. Awkward Turtle
haha! Code word – AHHAHAWHLAITH”LIHAEPTOIJAPWET!!!!IHGALIHE!!!
xo – kb
I have to tell you…i had deja vu the other day. We are currently building a house, and i have a 19 month old son. We decided to go see daddy while he was working on the house. Little Hunter was in teh back seat with his veggie/fruit pouch (DID I NOT LEARN ANYTHING FORM YOUR POST!?!? 🙂 )….as we drive out…he’s quiet as can be. Get to our destination, go to grab the monster in the back seat…and he is covered in a mix of squash/pears just looking baffled as to waht happened to him! 🙂 I took my 14-week pregnant hormonel buns and just chuckled to myself…thinking “i knew better….this JUST happened to katie bower!” 🙂
I dont normally post comments…but i couldnt help but share! Thanks for your wonderful blog…you and YHL are my daily inspiration…someday i want to be HALF as cool as you and your 2 beautiful families:)
AHH! you were attacked by the squash/pears!
xo – kb